The Dangers of Misinterpretation

It is just after Christmas, and once again, the season did not disappoint. Christmas is wonderful for so many reasons, it is the celebration of the birth of Christ (If you're into that kind of thing), it is a time to be with loved ones, it is a time to be selfless and charitable. It is the season of giving, and I love watching people get into that spirit. But every silver lining has its cloud and Christmas is no different. Something happens every year at Christmas which is truly twisted, but it is oh so much fun to watch. Christmas is the season to be entertained by date rape. Alright, admittedly, that is a pretty brutal statement, but the sentiment is not inaccurate (excuse the double negative). Every year at Christmas there is one song that, taken by itself, is really something of a creepy song, yet under the guise of Christmas, we manage to ignore the subject matter and call it a warm and happy Christmas song. That song: "Baby, It's Cold Outside."

Sounds crazy, I know, but try this: forget the fact that it is Christmas time. Forget the fact that this song is associated with Christmas despite the fact that it actually has nothing to do with Christmas. Forget everything you know about this song and just read the lyrics:

I really can't stay (but baby it's cold outside)
I've got to go away (but baby it's cold outside)
This evening has been (been hoping that you'd drop in)
So very nice (i'll hold your hands, they're just like ice)
My mother will start worry (beautiful whats your hurry)
My father will be pacing the floor (listen to the fireplace
roar)
So really i'd better scurry (beautiful please don't hurry)
but maybe just a half a drink more (put some records on while i
pour)
the neighbors might faint (baby it's bad out there)
say what's in this drink (no cabs to be had out there)
i wish i knew how (your eyes are like starlight now)
to break this spell (i'll take your hat, your hair looks
swell)
i ought to say "no, no, no sir" (mind if i move in closer)
at least i'm gonna say that i tried (what's the sense in hurtin' my
pride)
i really can't stay (oh baby don't hold out)
baby it's cold out side

i simply must go (but baby it's cold outside)
the answer is no (but baby it's cold outside)
your welcome has been (how lucky that you droped in)
so nice and warm (look out the window at that storm)
my sister will be suspicious (gosh your lips look delcious)
my brother will be there at the door (waves upon the tropical shore)
my maiden aunts mind is vicious (gosh your lips are delicous)
but maybe just a cigarette more (never such a blizzard
before)
i've gotta get home (but baby you'd freeze out there)
say lend me a coat (it's up to your knees out there)
you've really been grand (i thrill when you touch my hand)
but don't you see?(how can you do this thing to me?
there's bound to be talk tomorrow (think of my lifelong
sorrow)
at least there will be plenty implied (if you got namonia and
died)
i really can't stay (get over that old out)
baby it's cold
baby it's cold outside

Now, what did you learn? It is important to remember that this song has absolutely nothing to do with Christmas either in subject matter nor in the timing of its composition. This song, for all intents and purposes, is about two people on a cold night. It is about a woman who is trying to leave a man's company while he uses every excuse he can think of to keep her from leaving. No matter how many times she says she must leave, he manages to keep her from going by telling her she will be cold, she won't be able to get a cab, he offers her drinks and cigarettes, he tries to seduce her with music, he tries to take her mind off of her worried family, and he even suggests that her health will suffer if she leaves. Now, I went to college, and I thought I heard (or perhaps said) every line imaginable to keep women from leaving (to no avail mind you), but Frank Loesser has me totally beat, this is the reason you have heard of him and not me. He is the true pick-up artist, for never did I think Pneumonia would act as a tool for seduction.

Say what you will about this song. Say it is about love. Say it is about companionship. Even say the man is only looking out for the woman's well-being. But when you are finished deluding yourself, just remember that humans are animals and men are pigs (or as Loesser himself has suggested, this man is the "wolf," and the woman is the "mouse"), and the lyrics give every indication that this man is interested in one thing: nailing this woman. Likewise, the woman's lyrics give every indication that it is best if she not stay with the man despite his urging.

It is obviously preposterous and unreasonable to suggest that the result of this song is that the two end up having non-consensual sex, but we, as an audience, do not know. Maybe they fall in love, get married, have half a dozen kids, and tell a glorified story about banging in a snow storm to their friends and neighbors at dinner parties. OR, maybe they bump pelvises and then never speak again. OR, maybe she leaves. All we know is that he overtly wants her and she overtly wants to leave, and in the end, we don't know the outcome. Regardless of the outcome, we must admit that it is a little sick that couples cozy up next to a warm fire around the holidays and glorify this song. It doesn't end here either.We do this kind of thing all of the time.

Context is a powerful thing that is far too often ignored in everyday life especially as it pertains to music. Music is deceptive. There are a lot of elements in music that act as distractions from the true messages, and from time to time, we get our signals crossed and end up taking a song for the exact opposite of what it is. Example? If you have ears and have been alive since 1908, you have no doubt heard (at least the chorus to) "You Are My Sunshine."

If not, it goes something like this:

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
when skies are gray
You'll never know dear
How much I love you
Oh please don't take my sunshine away

Cute right? Wrong. Despite the fact that this song appears to be a ballad for one's lover in order to express his undying love, you would only be half right. Here are the versus you may not be familiar with:

The other night dear, as I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken
So I hung my head and I cried.


(Chorus)


I'll always love you and make you happy,
If you will only say the same.
But if you leave me and love another,
You'll regret it all some day


(Chorus)


You told me once, dear, you really loved me
And no one else could come between.
But now you've left me and love another;
You have shattered all of my dreams:


(Chorus)


In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me
When I awake my poor heart pains.
So won't you come back and make me happy
I'll forgive you dear, I'll take all the blame.

So, what is largely considered a sweet expression of love from one lover to another, it is really a bit of a heart wrenching plea from one ex-lover to another. The speaker is essentially begging his former lover to come back to him because since she left him to be with someone else, he is a complete trainwreck. Didn't see that one coming did you? Why would we want to think about the song like this? Independently, the chorus is loving and uplifting, and at the end of the day, that is what we want to recall, it is easy to forget that the rest of the song is actually pretty depressing. That's the theme: remember what you want, omit what you don't.

One of the more classic instances of this phenomena was in 1984 when Ronald Reagan, not realizing it was an anti-war protest song about Vietnam Veterans, wanted Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA" to be his presidential campaign song. Clearly, the Reagan camp listened to the chorus, felt that the song was, not only an upbeat feel-good song, but also purely patriotic. How could they lose? Springsteen obviously denied them use of the song, probably because 1) Springsteen is fundamentally a liberal who represents the working-class and 2) Reagan missed the point of the song completely. Reagan, like many other people, heard what he wanted and omitted the rest. What does it matter what the vast majority of the song says when the hook sounds so patriotic?

Misinterpreting popular music is no different from misinterpreting any other art form whether it be painting, theatre, dance, sculpture, or photography in that the "meaning" lies with the beholder, so there is really no such thing as a "wrong" interpretation, however, it is impossible to gain a full assessment of any form of art by ignoring certain parts of a piece and instead embracing other parts. For example. Let us take Norman Rockwell's "The Problem We All Live With". Interpretation of the entire work is completely subjective, but interpretation of a single part and applying that to the work as a whole is completely misleading, unfair, and, forgive me for saying, wrong. By treating this painting the same way the Reagan camp treated "Born in the USA," it would be possible to say it is about nothing more than a little girl walking to school, or it is about nothing more than a splattered tomato on a wall, or it is about nothing more than the suit of a US Marshall. I'm sorry to say this, but none of those things are accurate. One must take a step back and examine the work in it's entirety in order to fully assess it's "meaning."

There are many popular songs that are commonly misinterpreted: "Rainy Day Women #12 and 35," "Cocaine," "American Woman," "Norwegian Wood." I challenge you to take a step back, forget what you know or think you know, and re-examine music, and all art for that matter. If not, you may soon find yourself snuggling up on Christmas Day with your lover listening to songs about date rape.